Julius M. Schaeffer and Yetta

First I found this Simply Vera bag. Yes, it's not leather - but that's perfect for summer. You take it to the beach, you drip ice cream on it, you get caught in a sudden thunder storm - and you wipe it and go. And you can't tell, but it's plum, a nice change of pace! I was already digging this bag when I read the name - Ombre. Now I have no idea why anyone would name this bag "Ombre", but is there anywhere out there who can say or read "Ombre" without doing it in the same cadence and voice of Joey's perfume-sprayer nemesis? And doesn't just saying "Ombre" that way make you feel so happy? Having this $53 bag will guarantee you chronic long term happiness.





So, I thought I was done with Kohl's site - and then I saw this bee-yoo-tee-ful, to quote my Aunt Yetta, Simply Vera dress. In fact, this $39 dress is the antithesis of the white, polyester double knit, Florida retiree slacks Florida retiree Aunt Yetta favored - it is sleek and sexy and it glitters. It is not something you would wear to buy chickens at Oriole Kosher. You must click on this link and then view the incredibly gorgeous sequined razorback. Only problem is the website has only size 12 available. Which sucks if that is not your size. Then you have to go into Kohl's in person and be incredibly put off by their checkout counters that are more Safeway than Saks (think conveyor belt). Now there's a setup Aunt Yetta would really have dug. And she'd buy the Ombre bag - it's roomy enough for all the sweet'n'low packets she'd swipe at lunch in the clubhouse.