If Brooklyn's So Great, Why Are You HERE?

Well, I am locked in my bedroom as a TV interview is being conducted in my living room. First the interviewer/sound guy/cameraman insulted my neighborhood. Then the man told me how great his neighborhood, South Williamsburg, is. This happened only hours after I complained (ranted) on Facebook about not being able to bear one more person's extolling the virtues of hip Brooklyn. Someone should tell this man how rude it is to a) insult your host's neighborhood, while in her living room, when perhaps nobody knows exactly where you went and therefore where to search for the body and b) to chat about the people living in your new, hip neighborhood for generations before you got there as if you are observing them in some sort of zoo. Also, learn to pronounce their sect's name - they are not 'the Satmire.'

And so, while stuck in my room, I am shopping. Are these not great? I know a certain hipster in my living room would not think so, because they are $20 and come from Old Navy. But I can quadruple their price, put them in an eco-bag with with the name of a store in some fake Brooklyn neighborhood ("Redhook Heights Vicinity" - or better yet, "DoWiSeTrePla") and watch him snap up a pair for his overly pierced ("it's art") girlfriend.

PS - the color is "Black Jack" which I misread, and preferred, as "Jack Black.