Hup Two Three Four (& Five, Six, Seven)

Women are famous for having an insatiable hunger for shoes (or boots). Some of us, though, are outerwear-obsessed. I am that some of us. Which means real problems, since my coat closet is that rare closet shape, a triangle, and is supposably adequate storage for my collection as well as a jacket or two for the other members of my family. Never enough down jackets. Or wool coats. Or long sweaters. Or leather blazers. Or, for some unexplained reason, khaki, army-inspired jackets. It could be the Freaks & Geeks influence. Or the influence of the real life freaks at my high school, the burnouts. (Let's be honest though - when it comes to my influences, the sad truth is that tv is the more likely culprit.) Regardless, I have my eye on this Lucky Brand (surprise!) one for $50, from $169 (use your 40% off coupon), in store only. The other members of my family will have to just store their outerwear in the three corners of my - our - closet.

Flowered Dress: The Saga

I am obsessed with this dress.

I'm not sure why -- I have a sneaky suspicion that it will look TERRIBLE in person. But nonetheless, I have decided that I need it. However, it's not available in any of the Ann Taylor LOFT stores around here, so I have to order it from the site and can't try it on. I figured I can just return it to a store if I don't like it, but I don't want to be out the cost of shipping if that happens, so I need a free shipping coupon code. The only one I could find (free shipping + 15% off!) required a $75 minimum purchase. After getting this dress in 2 different sizes (at $29.99 each), it still wasn't enough, so I had to order another dress to get my order high enough for free shipping (+15% off!).

I'm still not sure either size of the first dress will fit. So when I went back to the site today and saw that they suddenly had it another size that could maybe possibly fit (I'm super-weird when it comes to dress sizes), I of course had to order that one, too. But how to get this new order up to $75? Well, these shoes.
And this belt.

So to recap: One dress in 3 different sizes. Another dress. A pair of shoes. A belt. The things I'll do for a coupon code.

Of course, I may still wind up returning ALL of it. Stay tuned for the next chapter . . .

More Pleasant Peasant

Over the last two summers I have bought several peasant-y blouses... and thrown them out. If you are looking to add volume to your torso, they are definitely the way to go. But if you, like me, live in terror of people describing you as "a big girl," the flowy peasant blouse is not for you. But I think this is an awesome compromise - peasant-y style, with an actual waist! And it would look equally at home with a loose, breezy skirt or tailored work trousers. Peace and harmony for $22.80.

Now on the Center Stage - Tina

As a young child, I refused the nickname "Jaynie." It lacked dignity. Instead I longed for the more elegant "Tina" or "Bubbles." Apparently, I had big plans to be an exotic dancer (we called them strippers back then).

These shoes are called Tina. As such, they are rightfully mine. I'll pass on the coordinating pasties.

Bold and the Beautiful

It's officially spring, and New York City is embracing a bright new color palette. See Exhibit 1 ($48):

Super Sweater to the Rescue

Victoria's Secret calls this sweater a "featherweight scoopneck babydoll sweater" but I think of it as a "featherweight scoopneck hide-it-all sweater." Overindulge in, let's say, a rice and bean burrito at lunch? This sweater sees to it that only you at the burrito-ista know. Working your way through all the snacks in your apartment solely in the interest of giving your kitchen a good spring cleaning, hypothetically speaking? The only sign of this virtuous activity will be your thinned out cabinets.

I do take issues with the site's claim that you can wear this top "all year long," but with the top's camouflaging superpowers, I kind of wish it qualified as swimwear.

Blue Light Special

Even though I know that it is wrong, and I'm supposed to hate them for being an evil corporate empire out to take over the world, I openly admit to loving Wal-Mart. I grew up in the suburbs, in a small city that boasted not 1 but 2 Super-Wal-Marts. In college, going to Wal-Mart was something of a social event -- you were always sure to see someone you knew -- and I went at least once, if not twice, a day.

But then I moved to NYC, and there is no Wal-Mart here. There is a K-Mart (multiple K-Marts, in fact), but I was always skeptical.

Until yesterday. During a quick trip to K-Mart to pick up some Ziploc sandwich bags, I was on my way to check out the nail polish selection (a favorite hobby; I can never have too many colors), I espied this tote. I think it's adorable in a late-80s, neon graffiti way, and it's such a great size and shape -- really convenient for carrying stuff to and from work, and could possibly even fit a laptop.

And aren't you in luck -- while I had to pay full price ($16.99), it's on sale on the web site for $11.89! Barely more than my box of Ziplocs.

Happy Couple (of Dresses)

As Jayn has recently observed (quite astutely), I'm kind of obsessed with wedding registries. It's true -- while getting married is of no immediate concern to me, I fantasize about registering for gifts. Picking out a whole long list of things other people then have to buy for you? What more could anyone want?

However, the whole thing is kind of unfair to single people, when you think about it. Do only married people deserve to have fancy kitchen appliances and nice linens? I think not; as an avid baker and sleeper, I deserve kitchen gadgets and linens, too. But with no wedding on the horizon (and let me be clear, I am just fine with that) I am forced to acquire them the old-fashioned way: buying them for myself (for the most part -- thanks Mom!).

So what will happen when (if) I do someday get married? I'm clearly still going to expect presents. But what will I have left to register for? I'm thinking clothes, like maybe these colorful H&M dresses -- or whatever the equivalent style is 50 years from now.

Summer Kicks

My commitment to hastening the change of seasons is now extending to footwear. With sunshiney days mere minutes away, I will need to ditch my boots, all umpteen pair of them. But what to wear to work? Why these brown, ruffley, t-strap pumps for only only $36!

On a Li'l Mission

At Amanda's college they have sororities and wear slutty nighties to pajama parties. At my college we have little sisters and we hand down our big wooden hoops to them. My little sister Susie, known to me as li'l since the day we met, is a on a quest for a black leather shoulder bag for around $50. And as all I really ever did for her was give her a big wooden hoop, I kind of do owe her. So here's what I've located so far:

$40, PVC

$39, leather-look

$70, leatha

$50, leatha

And the obvious choice…$30, hemp

Summer Sooner

If you are looking for someone to blame, it's me. For a couple of days it was warmer here. And then I took my eyes off the prize and we slipped immediately back into winter. I admit it, I lost focus, and for that I apologize. It won't happen again. I am back on track. Starting with this $37 dress, I will dedicate my considerable, caffeine-powered, telekinetic focus entirely to bringing on summer. With only a brief break to focus on getting some Magnolia cupcakes to float their way up Columbus. Chocolate. With pink icing.

Buy the Bag, Save the Economy

I love this $60 leather bag. It has that fold-over look that's big this year, and kind of a western, rock aesthetic. But it's best feature is that it is a clutch. When you are clutching this bag, you can't buy shopping bags full of merchandise, since you pretty much need your whole hand to hang on to this bag. So it will prevent you from shopping and save you money.

Oh. You could put this bag in one of the shopping bags. In that case, the clutch does not hinder you from stimulating the economy. Buy it in all its Keynesian glory.

Good Investment

When I showed this vest to Amanda, she felt obligated to point out that I am not actually Sheryl Crow. Sometimes I forget. It does explain why the royalty checks for Subaru commercials are not piling up. So, I don't know that I will actually ever wear this vest, now that Amanda has revealed my true identity, but, we both agreed that if I am going to buy a vest (because I need to) and not wear it, it is best to buy this one at $20, than another for much more.

Insert Skirt Pun

I am fairly certain my mother had this exact skirt when I was a kid. No doubt it was purchased at the only clothing store in my small, incredibly waspy, town - Carroll Reed (which, I was amused to learn, was called "Carroll Reed of New England" throughout the non-New England regions of the country).

I think this skirt will be a great staple for summer, with a blouse, a tank, a sweater - and I like it sooo much better with these funky wooden platforms, than the boat shoes I am certain my mother wore with it. Because, being Jewish and from Brooklyn, and not living remotely near the water, my mother wore those boat shoes every day. (Coincidentally, Shoes.com emailed me today that boat shoes are back. There is a line I will not cross in my sentimental shopping, and boat shoes are about two nautical miles over that line.)

The Snowy Day

Sometimes, nothing goes your way. Sometimes it's Monday morning, and you wake up to a snowstorm, yet another sign that winter is NEVER GOING AWAY, and the knowledge that you have to go into work and deal with all the things that you didn't finish last week, despite staying late every single day.

Sometimes your clients are mad at your entire team for something that admittedly got screwed up, though not because of anything you did, but they can't yell at your entire team and instead will just yell at you, and sometimes you know that that is gonna happen today.

Sometimes your boyfriend will have the day off, on account of the snow, and even though it's just as snowy where you are, and you have never had a snow day in your entire LIFE, you still won't have one today, and instead you will have to GO to work and deal with all of the above.

And then sometimes, if you're really lucky, your building will be evacuated due to a "smoke situation," and you will tell everyone that you are going to work from home, when you really mean you are going to "work" from "home," and you will leave to join that boyfriend-with-the-day-off and go sledding in the park.

If that happens, you should bring a scarf.

Right Here is Where You Start Paying... in Sweat

I love these multi-textured, gray, t-strap shoes. They look like some kind of dance shoes. Like something you might wear with a swirly skirt. Dancing on the lunchroom table with all your friends. In the new version of Fame. When are they going to call me and tell me which part I am playing (please let it be Coco, please let it be Coco!)?

$80, from $148, on the Anthropologie site, but $40 in the store (and they'll give you 20% off that because the nubuck scuffs easily).