The Legend of Brooklyn

Once upon a time, many years ago, as far back as the late '90s, in a faraway village called East, there lived a group of twentysomethings. They were all recent college graduates, some from Pratt, some from NYU -- though the latter would be quick to tell you they were in Gallatin, and all bankrolled by parents they liked to pretend they didn't have.

They were happy in their little Village, and rarely left, until one fateful day, when the Villagers found themselves with a lot of time on their hands. You see, unsuccessful dotcom start-ups pretty much ran themselves, they couldn't watch TV because they all pretended they hated TV, and none of the Villagers was due to get a new face tattoo anytime soon. So they decided to go on adventure.

"Where should we go?" cried one, as she fiddled with her lip ring.

"We could go West," suggested another.

"No, not West! West is the Land of the Men Who Are Gay Unironically. We cannot go west," explained the first.

"How about South?" offered a third Villager.

"No, not South! I had Chinese for lunch," said another, running his hand through his dreadlocks.

They all knew they could not go North, for they were afraid of North. North was the domain of the People in Suits, and the Villagers were terrified the People in Suits would trap them in their cubicle dungeons. So that left only . . .

"East? How can we go East? East is only water!" wondered the Villagers.

"Then we will CROSS the water!" declared the bravest of them all.

So they all put on their tightest jeans, and packed some kimchi for the road, and departed on their journey to cross the water, which they did via the L train.

And lo and behold, once they made it to the other side, they were rewarded for their bravery and cunning, for the found a land of riches, a magical land no one had ever seen before. There were dive bars as far as the eye could see, vintage clothing shops on every corner, and not a single Starbucks. Indie music filled the air, PBR flowed like water, and a faint scent of pot tingled their noses.

The Villagers cried in delight, and hugged each other -- but, you know, ironically. "We have discovered the promised land! A land no one has ever seen before! We will call it Brooklyn. Here we can dwell, and open pottery studios!"

And so they stayed, and they live there to this day.

Commemorate their historic journey with this t-shirt, $16 through Sunday.

Collar the Market

Sometimes when I wear a coat with a collar I get nervous that the collar will flap around and my lipstick will rub onto it. Which is weird, because mostly I buy lipstick and then keep it safely in my medicine cabinet. But once in awhile I wear lipstick - until I get to work and eat my breakfast at my desk. And during the period from when I first put the coat on until I remove my coat and take my first bite of cranberry muffin, I am always craning my neck in weird ways to keep that collar clean. This coat ($97 with the 25% off code) has its collar firmly secured by buttons. So for the five minutes that Im actually wearing lipstick, I won't be doing that weird pigeon thing with my neck. I'm hoping that means an end to the old man with the baggy pants tossing crusts of bread in my direction.

Everything in moderation

Hello. I'm back again from another hiatus. I was dealing with some career issues. (They in no way prevented me from blogging, but I did have to deal with them, and I will pretend the relationship was causal.)

So what brought me back? Well, I was pondering one of life's important questions: how many black dresses is too many?

It's a difficult question, and one that requires consideration of many factors before determining the answer. For instance, does this question apply only 

to ALL-black dresses? What about, say, black dresses with white stripes, or with pink flowers? What about trim? And seasonality? Sleeve length? Skirt length? Material?

As you see, there are many, many points of differentiation that can set one black dress apart from another. Which makes me realize that this one is VERY different than the 15 I already own. I don't have a knee-length black dress with long sleeves, a tie at the waist AND pin-tucking trim at the bust!

But I will soon. $32, + 25% off this weekend.

Today's Your Luckier Day

I have no idea what we should be writing here. Something about how we love shopping but don't love to spend $250 on a cami or $450 on shoes. You know, because we are actual people in the real world, with actual jobs that pay actual, dishearteningly inadequate salaries. We are not magazine editors who are gifted these items and then write about them as if they were not paid dishearteningly inadequate salaries themselves.

For example - how adorable and luckier is this dress (photo edited for your wellbeing)?

And at $19, you have money left over for cupcakes. We're just saying.